Shifting your Mindset: The Art of Saying “No”

I’ve started to notice how common it is for young people to be overworked without question. In the third and final installment of the series: Shifting Your Mindset: Productivity & Mental Health, I will be sharing what may be the most important lesson I have learned so far in my life as a young person. That lesson is this: it is okay to say “No.” Focusing on a few key projects that you are passionate about can be more effective than spreading yourself too thin. It can be as simple as prioritizing quality over quantity! 

Saying “No”

Saying “No” to opportunities that come your way and setting personal boundaries for your commitments can be challenging for anyone, especially when you may feel pressured to agree. Saying “No” to an opportunity that presents itself will not make or break you. It is true that “No” is a complete sentence.

In my own life, I have a habit of saying “Yes” when asked to work on a project, lead a meeting, or make a time commitment. While saying “Yes” has led to opportunities to build my resume, saying yes is not always the best option. At times, I have overcommitted and simply overworked myself. I spent so long believing that by turning an opportunity down I would be hindering my growth, or putting myself behind where I should be. I was also convinced that because I told someone I was too busy with other commitments, that I may be taken out of consideration in the future.

The reality is that none of these things were true. It is possible to say “No” and communicate that while you may not have time or space in your mind to focus on the opportunity now, you may in the future. You can even simply respond “Not at this time” and that is okay! You do not always have to explain why.

Finding a balance

In my life today, I have been able to find a balance. Just because I am passing on an opportunity does not mean I won’t still end up where I need to be. The same is true for anyone reading this. Just because you decline a job offer, take a year off school, or simply choose to focus on yourself or other commitments first, you can still end up where you want to be. I mentioned in part 1 that managing your time includes taking time to recharge. Managing your time well also means prioritizing what you value as important. That means being intentional with time spent on what you feel like you should be doing versus what you realistically can do while still making time for yourself. The next time someone asks you to take on another commitment or task, try asking yourself these questions:

• How will this opportunity strengthen my personal development?
• What skills can this opportunity help me gain?
• How does this opportunity align with my interests?

That being said, working your way up in the world is not in itself a “bad thing,” but it does not need to be the only consideration. You deserve more than to overwork and overcommit yourself and sacrifice your energy for a task. 

Saying “No” is empowering

While the ability and confidence to tell someone “No” may be a skill that needs practice, it is one that can be used throughout life and become an empowering tool for your future. Something I wish I knew sooner is this: Just because you decline a job offer, take a break from school, or choose to focus on yourself, you can still end up where you want to be. Saying “No” to an opportunity will not impact your success.

To close this three-part series, I would like to reiterate that what I have learned has taken me a few years and I am definitely still learning. Especially when it comes to being mindful and intentional with my time, focusing on mental health and being productive as a young person. I am proud of how far I have come, and I hope I have been able to help someone else feel understood and empowered to shift their mindset and improve their own mental health.